April 2005 News

NOT COMIN' BACK NOW, YA HEAR?
Paul Henning, the man who created THE BEVERLY HILLBILLIES, has died at the age of 93 of natural causes In Toluca Lake, California. He is survived by three children and two grandchildren.

BOOK THROWN AT SIZEMORE
Actor Tom Sizemore was sentenced to 17 months in jail, as well as four months in drug rehab for repeatedly failing seven drug tests while on probation. He was on probation for beating ex-girlfriend Heidi Fleiss in 2003.

BACK ON THE MARKET
Jennifer Aniston has now officially filed for divorce with hubby Brad Pitt, which ends their four and a half year marriage. Now Brad can have a stab at Angelina Jolie and thousands of day dreaming perverts can try for a shot with Aniston.

DINO DNA
Recently, scientists recovered soft tissue from a Tyrannosaurus Rex fossil. Through the discovery, they have now been able to determine that the tissues were soft and flexible. Way to go scientists! Now, all you have to do is clone the T-Rex and we can have a real JURASSIC PARK.

ICED PEE
The Marshall Space Flight Center in Alabama has created a device that will turn astronauts sweat, respiration, and urine into drinkable water that is supposedly purer than any tap water. This new water will be tested this fall by tsunami victims in Asia as well as Iraqis.

IN ASSHOLE NEWS
Senator Austin Allran of North Carolina is working on legislation to ban Minesweeper and Solitaire from all government building computers. Itís good to know that Senator Allran canít think of any other legislation, that would actually benefit his constituency, to put through to law.

TRAILER TRASH
Former 1989 Playboy Playmate Jennifer Jackson, was arrested on a receiving stolen property warrant. Jackson, who now lives in a trailer park in Ohio, was accused of having $600 dollars worth of tools in her trailer that were allegedly stolen from a nearby trailer. Hef knows how to pick ëem, eh?

ONE HUNGRY BROAD
While fat people around the Clearfield Pennsylvania area flock to Dennyís Beer Barrel Pub to finish off the restaurantís 11 pound burger, no one has ever been able to finish within the alloted time of three hours. Enter Kate Stelnick, a 115 pound college student. She was able to down the burger with over five minutes to spare. Dennyís now plans on making a bigger burger called the Kate Burger.

SHOW ME THE MONEY
Richard Kreimer, a homeless man who won $230,000 in 1991 after suing the Morristown, New Jersey library, as well as the city itself, is back at it again. He is now suing NJ Transit for over five million dollars claiming he and other homeless people have been unlawfully thrown out of New Jersey train stations since August.

SAY HELLO TO MY LITTLE FRIEND
Columbian police have found a homemade submarine carrying 100 million pounds of cocaine. Where the recovered submarine was headed, as well as far as it could travel have not been released.

DYLANíS INNER BLACKNESS
Bob Dylan has now given permission for Hollywood to make a movie about his life. The movie will have seven actors portraying Dylan, including a black woman. Director Todd Haynes said the woman is needed to portray the singerís inner blackness.

TEEN IDOLS REHASH
Three former members of Nashvilleís Teen Idols, as well as one member from Rehasher have joined together to form Bullets to Broadway. The band has recently recorded eight tracks and plans on touring early this summer. For more information, hit up HYPERLINK http://www.bulletstobroadway.com.www.bulletstobroadway.com.

NO USE FOR A DVD
After the bandís new full-length and EP come out this year, expect a DVD to be released as well. While the DVD still doesnít have a release date, it will include interviews and plenty of backstage goodness.

WEST COAST BLUEPRINT
Michiganís own Blueprint 76, which is fronted by former Suicide Machine Royce Nunley will be heading out this May on their first West Coast tour. In all, the band will be spending three weeks there. For tour dates, go to HYPERLINK http://www.blueprint76.com.www.blueprint76.com.

THE GREAT DVD SWINDLE
May 3 marks the release date of the DVD edition of the great Sex Pistols film THE GREAT ROCK ëNí ROLL SWINDLE. The movie, directed by Julien Temple of FILTH & THE FURY fame will also contribute and audio commentary for the release.

BURNING DOWN THE HOUSE
A recent New Found Glory show in New York was shut down by the New York Fire Department because the venue, Webster Hall, was found to be structurally unstable. Unfortunately, the Fire Department arrived too late because New Found Glory was finished with half their set before things got shut down. Zing!

CAKE BOY COMING SOON
The second full-length feature film from Kung Fu Films will finally see the light of day. CAKE BOY, which some of you remember as SELWYNíS NUTS will be released on DVD on May 19. The DVD will be packaged with a free soundtrack CD as well.

ALL-AMERICAN SPRING TOUR
Stillwater Oklahomaís own All-American Rejects have announced a spring tour that will go from March 29 all the way through May 29. This tour is a warm up for this summerís Warped Tour, which theyíre also scheduled to appear on.

SURFíS UP FUCKERS
The March 8 Over It in store performance brought out more than just fans. A group of surfers came to the event and caused trouble. Apparently, the surf gang took offense to the title of the bandís new CD SILVERSTRAND, which pays homage to the Ventura County beach.

LOS CASUALTIES EN ESPANOL
SideOneDummyís own The Casualties will be rereleasing their latest album ON THE FRONT LINE in Spanish. This version, hitting stores in April, has been completely redone in Spanish and will included enhanced features and a bonus track.

ATARI FILLER
If youíre waiting for The Ataris to finish up their second Columbia Recordsí album, then bassist Mike Davenport may just be able to help you tide things over until itís released. He has teamed up with former Atarisí guitarist Marco Pena to form Pencapchew. All the information on Davenportís side project can be found at HYPERLINK http://www.pencapchewmusic.com.www.pencapchewmusic.com.

LOOK AT ALL THE LOVE WE FOUND
Itís taken awhile, but a bonafide Sublime tribute album will be released this summer on June 21. The tribute will feature bands like No Doubt, Bargain Music, Ozomatli, Pennywise, Avail, and The Ziggens. For more information, plus two preview tracks go to HYPERLINK http://www.myspace.com/sublimetribute.www.myspace.com/sublimetribute.

ANTI NO CHILD LEFT BEHIND
Anti-Flag joined two congressman on Capital Hill March 17 to announce a petition to end a loophole in the No Child Left Behind Act. Currently, federal law permits military recruiters to obtain private student information. Anti-Flag has launched HYPERLINK http://www.militaryfreezone.orgwww.militaryfreezone.org to help parents and students take action against this. Youíll also be able to sign the petition there.

WIN AN IPOD SHUFFLE
If youíre sick of trying to get referrals to receive a free iPod, Gatsbyís American Dream may be able to help. Theyíve launched HYPERLINK http://www.andthevolcano.comwww.andthevolcano.com to preview their new album coming out this April on Fearless Records. While previewing the tracks, you can also enter to win free swag, including a free iPod Shuffle.

HAND PICKED
Former members of At the Drive In have hand picked a collection of their greatest hits, which spans the bandís entire career. Youíll be able to get this album on May 24. Besides the 18 tracks, youíll also be treated to a nice DVD. This collection is being called THIS STATION IS NON-OPERATIONAL. HYPERLINK http://www.smartpunkonwarped.com.

VANDALS AT WAR
By now most of you have heard about The Vandalsí trip to perform in Iraq and Kuwait, as well as the aftermath. The band has now launched a site to tell the full story, including pictures and video. Learn the real deal at HYPERLINK http://www.vandals.com/war.www.vandals.com/war.

FEARLESS SO THEY SAY
Fearless Records has added SoTheySay to their roster recently. This St. Louis band will be heading into the studios soon to record their debut album which is expected to be released in June.

THE LEAK
Avenged Sevenfold has announced two special tour dates in May where they will only play material from their upcoming album. The shows are scheduled for May 4 in Los Angeles and May 6 in San Diego. After those shows, itís off to Europe and this yearís Warped Tour for the band.

PHAT RING TONES
Fat Wreck Chords now has songs from their roster available for download on your cell phone as ringtones. For Alltell, Metro PCS, US Cellular, and Verizon, look for them in the Modtones DJ Store. For ATT and Virgin, look in the ringerís section.

REGGAE WITH A TWIST
SideOneDummy Records has recently signed the Canadian band Bedouin Soundclash. Described as reggae with a twist, youíll be able to see what the commotion is about May 10 when the bandís SideOne debut, SOUNDING A MOSAIC, is released.

TATTOOED MILLIONAIRES WILD CRAZY SUMMER
Not only have the Tattooed Millionaires signed with Criterion Records, but theyíll also be working on a new album, playing the Warped Tour, and playing at this yearís Hultsfred Festival in Sweden. Not a bad way to stay busy this summer.

NO TRIGGER FOR NITRO
Nitro Records have now signed a hardcore/punk act out of Massachusetts called No Trigger. Theyíve been likened to bands such as Strike Anywhere, Against Me!, and Kid Dynamite. Their first Nitro release should be available in early 2006.

EAT THE WORM
Metal Bladeís own God Dethroned will be heading out on tour soon on the White Worm tour. The shows will all take place in Europe. No word on any US dates as of yet.

THE ABSENCE
Tampa, Floridaís own gods of melodic metal have signed to one of the premier metal labels recently. The bandís Metal Blade Recordsí debut this fall. They also be planning a massive tour in support of the release.

SMUT PEDDLERS KICKED OUT OF EUROPE
Because of some comments made in an interview with Ox Fanzine, the booking agency handling the Smut Peddlersí European tour cancelled the tour and ended their relationship with the TKO Recordsí band. TKO Records is currently trying to help the band get their tour back together.

VICTORY TOSSES THE SALAD
Jumping on the Celtic punk bandwagon, Victory Records has now added The Tossers to their line up. While people may know more about Dropkick Murphys or Flogging Molly, itís safe to say both of those bands borrowed a page from The Tossersí book. This is very exciting news in my opinion.

TRIO FANS REJOICE
Vagrantís own Alkaline Trio has released the artwork and track listing for their upcoming album CRIMSON. While the artwork is a bit questionable, Iím sure the music will more than make up for its tackiness.

DONíT PANIC
Itís been two years since MxPx released a full-length of new material. Well, the new album already has a release date of July 12. Now it has a name. The new album will be called PANIC and the band plans a record release party on the bandís Vancouver, British Columbia stop at this summerís Warped Tour. Iím sure their hometown fanbase will be thrilled.

DEATH IN NELLYíS FAMILY
Nellyís sister lost her four year battle with leukemia recently. Nelly has cancelled four of his tour dates in wake of the death. The status of the rest of the tour is also in question.

POOR KID
Jonathan Davis of Korn fame and porn star wife Devon Davis have now joined the ranks of weird celebrity baby names. Gwyneth has Apple. Frank Zappa has Dweezil and Moon Unit. Now, Davis has Pirate. Thatís right Jonathan Davis named his kid Pirate. Arghhhh!

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